Why We’re Desperate for Good Dads (and How to Be One) - Guest Blog by Bo Stern-Brady
Michelle Watson
Bo Stern-Brady is one of my dearest friends whom I deeply love, respect and admire. I’m honored to have her writing this guest blog today where she speaks from her heart to yours about why fathers matter. Enjoy!
- Michelle
I recently talked to a woman who has been estranged from her father for many years. Her totally healthy father.
She wasn’t abused or yelled at. She just wasn’t much seen at all.
The story of her dad’s parenting could almost be told in one sentence, “He did nothing particularly bad and nothing significantly good.”
He tried to add a daughter into his life without stepping into hers.
He missed a chance to build and encourage her. Actually, he missed a million chances. Daily chances. And he missed nearly every opportunity to protect her from boys who also wanted to make her an accessory to their lives, but not a prize.
Similar stories are everywhere.
I know that dads are a popular scapegoat, and I’m not looking to castigate them here. But I will say: I believe the dad/daughter relationship is one of the most important and foundational elements to our well-being as women.
Our dads have the ability to teach without words.
Regardless of their educational background, vocational success or communication techniques, they constantly teach us (maybe more than anyone) about our own worth as women.
They teach us about beauty and how men view it.
They teach us about body image and sexuality and marriage and safety and commitment.
It’s ironic that men – who I think feel WAY in over their heads communicating to women – are holding so many of the cards when it comes to their daughters.
Today, I’m grateful for two things:
I’m so thankful for the good guys and the way they father their girls. (This includes my first husband who is now in heaven, and my current husband who is a boots-on-the-ground, do-what-you-say, stick-to-your-word kind of man and father).
Men who are willing to do the hard work of becoming better dads, which includes reading Michelle’s books. Because she writes in a way that men will enjoy, you will see that she does not take cheap shots or ridicule or condescend. She respects men and the role they fill and her writing proves it.
If you are a dad---or know a dad---struggling to connect with his daughter, you can learn on the job if you’re willing. For starters, grab her most recent book. You won’t be sorry. Not ever.
With hope, Bo